


Phaleristics

by Acts_of_Tekla



Category: Psych
Genre: Ficlet, Gen, Humor, International Fanworks Day 2018, Lassiter is a History Buff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-19 07:28:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13699770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Acts_of_Tekla/pseuds/Acts_of_Tekla
Summary: Det. Lassiter just wanted to meet his favorite historian and maybe buy some new books, but Shawn shows up totorpedo his plansuse his amazing psychic powers to get them to the front of the line.





	Phaleristics

**Author's Note:**

> Phaleristics is the historical study of military orders, decorations and medals.
> 
> Thanks to [kaerstyne](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaerstyne/pseuds/kaerstyne) for the last-minute beta!

It said something about what his life had become that when Shawn Spencer suddenly popped up beside him at the bookstore, Detective Lassiter was only momentarily startled.

“Hey, Lassie, who’s the line for?” Spencer asked, rising up on his toes to see the front.

“Dr. Elizabeth Blackman,” he replied, eyeing Spencer warily in case he suddenly decided to start climbing the bookcases.

“That name means nothing to me.”

“She’s a historian.”

“Like David McCullough?”

Lassiter snorted. “In that she actually provides a deep analysis of historical trends, no, she is nothing like David McCullough.”

“Only you would criticize a Pulitzer Prize winner for not being boring enough. Or is it just that he hasn’t written about the Civil War?”

“Actually Dr. Blackman’s focus is on the often-unacknowledged history of women in combat roles.”

“I guess that explains the line…” He rose up again and craned his neck. They’d moved forward a bit, but the line was pretty long for an academic historian. Long, and mostly filled with female grad students. Strangely, Spencer hadn’t gotten distracted by flirting with any of them.

“…Spencer, why are you actually here?”

“I’ve solved the Olsen case, but I’ll only be able to prove it if you’re standing at the fountain where the body was found in exactly…” He checked his phone. “…47 minutes.”

Lassiter clenched his teeth. On the one hand, Spencer was usually—infuriatingly—right. On the other, it was possibly his only chance to meet Dr. Blackman in person....but no, there was no other hand. The job came first. He sighed and stepped out of line.

“Aww, cheer up, Lassie! That doesn’t mean that I can’t help you do your nerdy book thing first!”

Before Lassiter knew what was happening, Shawn had dragged him to the front of the line.

“Why, if it isn’t Becky Wilson, my favorite independent bookstore owner!”

Ms. Wilson smiled from behind the author’s table with the same baffling level of enthusiasm that Spencer always seemed to garner.

“Hi, Shawn, do you need a book recommendation?”

“Actually, I need a favor. My friend here, Detective Lassiter, is a huge fan of Dr. Blackman, but he has accompany me to a very important psychic crime scene. Can we…?”

“Oh! Sure, jump right in!” she said. The woman who had been next in line muttered something about patriarchy and the police state, but Lassiter wasn’t able to parse it before Spencer had pulled him to the table, grabbed the book from his hands, and opened to the title page in front of Dr. Blackman.

“Carlton Lassiter; he’s a big fan.”

“Spencer—” he hissed.

“Believe it or not, I already knew that,” Dr. Blackman said. Lassiter’s mouth suddenly went dry. “It’s quite uncommon to receive a handwritten letter, this day in age, and I was extremely gratified that you said you’d make a point of including Jenny Winslow’s assassination of Captain Quantrill in your reenactment. How did that go, by the way?”

She remembered the letter. _She remembered the letter._ “Fine, thank you,” Lassiter managed to squeak out.

“Except for the murder!” Shawn added brightly, “But it’s okay, we solved it. And now we’re going to go solve another one!” He scooped up the newly signed book and pulled Lassiter out the door, as always leaving chaos in his wake.

So much for a nice quiet Sunday.

**Author's Note:**

> If you're interested in learning more about real women who fought in the American Civil War, I recommend the book _They Fought Like Demons: Women Soldiers in the Civil War_ by DeAnne Blanton and Lauren M. Cook. Lauren Cook is an American Civil War reenactor who was ejected from an event for being a woman. She sued the US Parks Department for discrimination, and while the lawsuit was fought (and won) as a standard sex discrimination case, in the course of fighting it, she learned about real women who had disguised themselves as men and fought. After winning the lawsuit, she set out to collect their stories. There is also a documentary about women reenactors, _Reenactress: The Story of Jennie Reb & Betty Yank._


End file.
